Hear Them, HugThem, Then Hush


So, it’s Monday. I’m not one of those who hates Mondays. I like my job, so Monday is the day I get back to it. It helps to have had a very relaxing Sunday.

It’s been a while since the last blog, as I’ve been working to put the finishing touches on the book. I’ll be honest, this part has taken much longer than I was expected. It’s looking good, though and I’m beyond excited to get it on the market! I’ll keep you posted here.

Today, I had lunch with some ladies with whom I’ve been friends since all of our kids were in high school band together. We don’t meet even once a year, but today we met to grieve together. One of us has two grandchildren who went to Heaven just over a week ago.

It’s just unimaginable to think that is even possible. We’ve all heard that no parent should have to bury a child; that it is against the natural order of things. Yet sadly, it happens.

I’ve got several family members and friends who have babies/children in Heaven. One of those moms recently told me, “Hear them, hug them, then hush.” What great advice from one who knows!

It’s hard to know what to say. It may seem like too little to just saying “I love you,” but it is enough.

Even now, I’m thinking of a friend who said this to a grieving mom, “Oh, I know how you feel. My son was in jail one time.”

WHAT?!?! I couldn’t separate them fast enough. The grieving mom had certainly heard insensitive words before, but I was aghast. The well-meaning lady didn’t understand why I was not agreeing with her that the two circumstances were identical. Good grief! (No pun intended.)

After my father-in-law died, I said how much I’d miss him and got chastised for being selfish and wanting him to still be in pain. WHAT?!?! That’s not what I said.

I’m sure I’ve said goofy and/or insensitive things to those who grieve. I just didn’t understand. I’m so sorry. Now, I’ll remember to hear them, hug them, then hush. This works, no matter who has passed.

Just something to think about next time there is an opportunity to share a moment with someone who is grieving. Less is more. Really.